Today was a pretty chill day. Did some cleaning in the apartment, baked lemon squares, and made fried oreos. Some of Emily’s friends (who I guess are my friends now too, haha) came over and we had a jam session. They were all guys by the way, which brings me to the point of why I titled this post with an Anberlin lyric.
If you read my post earlier this week, you may remember me mentioning having relationship issues (I mean, who doesn’t? But I feel I have a harder time connecting with people that most others do). With the exception of my sister, family, and a few close girlfriends, I find it kind of suffocating trying to get to know girls/women that I am not already acquainted with. But not so with guys. Maybe I am too harsh on my own sex, but girls are evil and manipulative. Sometimes when I meet a fellow female, I feel there’s this whole facade of niceness/politeness, (which is normal I guess, since you don’t know each other well enough to be cracking inappropriate jokes,etc.), and genuineness is just…lacking. A lot of girls feel the need to fill in empty gaps in a “conversation” but when they talk it’s more like they’re trying to impress with useless words. Maybe I’m cynic…or maybe I’m only annoyed because I am one of those girls. I don’t know. They just get on my nerves.
Guys on the other hand are like dogs. Now, I don’t mean this in the derogatory way that men are sometimes described, but I mean in the way that are are usually chill and straight-forward, no bs. I don’t think I’m falling for any “charms” or whatnot, and I don’t want to be one of those girls who have too many guy friends, (but I really don’t think that’ll be a problem because I’m just so awkward), (wow, that was a lot of “don’ts” in one sentence), but they are just so much more enjoyable to hang out with. Except for those emo types who can’t figure out what to do with all their feelings, I really appreciate the low-level/non-existent level of drama they bring to my life.
Hmm, well there was a lot more stuff I wanted to say on this topic, but it’s too much mish-mash in my head and I can’t formulate them into sentences yet.
Been going to sleep too late and waking up too early. Need more resting hours. Good night!